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#1: Jokes topic Author: Caledonian, Location: Aberdeen, Scotland

Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 2:43 pm
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OK in this topic post your jokes! Bad, naughty or just terrible. Also remember none are directed at anyone in person!!

A Scotsman walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hand.
The Scotsman man shouts ' Awa ye feel hoor thatÃƒÂ¢s full OÃƒÂ¢ coos Sharn'
(Don't drink the water, it's full of cow s ** t.)
The man shouts back 'I'm English, Speak English, I don't understand you'.
The Scotsman man shouts back 'Use both hands, you'll get more in.'

#2: Author: Soulfly, Location: Edinburgh,Scotland

Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 5:20 pm
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lol nice one

#3: Author: shadow, Location: Newcastle, England

Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 6:23 pm
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O this 1 is rude so dont read if u going to complain

A man whent to hospital to have an operation and the sergen took the mans balls out and replaced them with 2 onions,
two weeks later the man goes back for a check up, "how are you" says the doctor, the man replies "im having a few probems" - he continues "i cry when i piss, I get a hard on off a hot-dog stand and my wife gets heartburn after a blowjob.

#4: Author: Saspi,

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 3:20 am
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Ill tell a joke "only", only if Nighty tells one first.

#5: Author: Soulfly, Location: Edinburgh,Scotland

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 8:27 am
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The seven dwarfs are involved in a mining accident, the roof collapses and they are all buried alive. After several hours of frantic digging the rescue team hear a faint cry: " Rangers are Simply the best, Rangers are simply the best." The rescue team leader turns to his assistant and says "At least we know Dopey is still alive!"

#6: Author: Caledonian, Location: Aberdeen, Scotland

Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 10:32 am
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— Resistance
Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights.

LMAO

— Soulfly
The seven dwarfs are involved in a mining accident, the roof collapses and they are all buried alive. After several hours of frantic digging the rescue team hear a faint cry: " Rangers are Simply the best, Rangers are simply the best." The rescue team leader turns to his assistant and says "At least we know Dopey is still alive!"

Haha thats a good one, not hear that before

Laughing

#7: Author: Caledonian, Location: Aberdeen, Scotland

Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 10:03 am
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terrible... but it has to be posted Laughing

Did you hear about the two Scotsmen who were stopped by the police for being drunk and disorderly? It turned out that the first had been drinking battery acid and the second had been swallowing fireworks.
One was charged and the other was let off.

#8: Author: Colin747, Location: Northern Ireland, UK

Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 11:02 am
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you should be kicked for posting that lol

#9: Author: shadow, Location: Newcastle, England

Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 11:39 am
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lol you scots might of hears of frankie boyle my favorate comedian and if you youtube search frankie boyle some great standups and stuff of mock the week Wink

#10: Author: Caledonian, Location: Aberdeen, Scotland

Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 2:54 pm
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yeah hes ok... but i prefer michael macintyre (spelling)

#11: Author: shadow, Location: Newcastle, England

Posted: Wed Aug 26, 2009 3:32 pm
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yea i watched him a few days ago on tv the live and laughing performance with the man draw Wink

anybody catch that?

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